What Not To Wear After 60

And other ridiculous rules we are told to follow

Photo by Charlota Blunarova on Unsplash

Fashion, put it all on me
Don't you wanna see these clothes on me?
Fashion, put it all on me
I am anyone you want me to be-Lady Gaga

I write about what it is like to exit middle age, the period after age 65. Algorithms must follow my posts because I am now flooded with "suggestions" on social media to aid in the aging process. One topic that keeps appearing is articles about the proper or acceptable way to dress after the age of 60. Apparently, there are "rules" we must follow. Seriously?

I googled "What not to wear after age 60," and these were some of the headlines:

6 FASHION FAUX PAS THAT KILL YOUR STYLE OVER 60

WHAT OUTFITS TO AVOID AFTER 60? 5 FASHION MISTAKES TO CORRECT URGENTLY TO LOOK NEITHER TOO YOUNG NOR TOO OLD

9 Fashion Mistakes That Make You Look Older

Faux pas? Mistakes? Look older? The wild thing is that the so-called rules contradict each other, leaving us in a state of perpetual confusion.

One article boldly declares that we should never wear monochromatic outfits, insisting that the top should always be a bright color with a darker bottom. Yet, the next story contradicts this, advocating for dressing in all one color or tonal dressing. It's a fashion paradox. And it doesn't stop there. One source warns that large scarves should be avoided at all costs, while another insists that scarves or high-necked shirts, like turtlenecks, should be a closet staple to 'Hide our sagging necklines! '. And believe it or not, one article actually had the audacity to say we should never wear belts?! It's enough to make your head spin.

Then there are the "Never wear" rules:

• No short skirts or low-necked tops

• No "fast fashion."

• Never match accessories

• No short-sleeved or tank tops.

• No trainers with anything but gym clothes

They go on to say that athleisure clothing such as yoga pants, hoodies, sweatsuits, and the like must be reserved for working out and should never be seen on the street. That only “young” people can pull off this look. I read an entire article where the author was trying to convince us that we should wear tucked in button-up shirts with pencil skirts and low boots with heels every day! Now, trust me, I adore that look, but every day? I live in a small mountain town in Northern New Mexico. We have few sidewalks...mostly gravel paths everywhere, with four actual seasons: snow in winter, mud in spring, and monsoon rains in summer. Being practical and stylish are my clothing goals for living here.

---

Who are these self-proclaimed fashion gurus, and what gives them the right to dictate our style choices? I, for one, find myself breaking these 'rules' almost daily. And you know what? I feel fabulous doing it. It is not about what you wear. It is how you style it, how the item fits, and what you feel comfortable in.

Let me clarify what I mean by comfortable. While the literal definition is important—too tight, too baggy, or ill-fitting doesn't work for me—I am talking about emotional comfort. What do I think looks good on me? Which styles work with my body? How confident am I with a particular outfit or look? How dressed up do I want to get? I exercise, hike, walk the dogs, work in my home office, volunteer at a spay/neuter clinic, garden, entertain, have lunch, coffee, or dinner with friends and family, travel, etc. And, while I want to look pulled together and stylish, each activity requires different clothing choices.

---

As I have stated in other posts, this is not an advice column. I am not an expert and will not tell you what you should or should not wear. My approach is to be brutally honest with myself regarding my changing body. While I weigh the same as when I was younger, things have shifted, ha! A full-length mirror is critical. I try on my clothes every season to see what still works for me. I experiment with different ways to style each item. I invest in quality pieces I can wear for the rest of my life. I would rather have fewer well-made pieces than a closet full of one-season options.

---

I say wear what you want. Be confident in your choices, ignore the haters, and trust your instincts. If you are questioning an outfit or feel uncomfortable, don't wear it. If you have a trusted friend(s) who will be honest and will tell you something looks good when it does or looks wrong when it honestly looks horrible, consider a closet "style-out" evening. Try everything on and experiment with different ways to wear—model for your friend(s). Determine what works, what could be altered to fit or change up the styling, and what needs to go. It is loads of fun. What is better than a closet where you can wear everything you own?

In future posts, I plan to expand this subject to discuss my "must-have" basics for a versatile wardrobe: the best denim, button-up shirts, trainers, layering pieces, accessories, LBDs, skirts, pants, and shoes. What would make your list?

Photo by Ellie Ellien on Unsplash

I am so curious to know how you all deal with this subject. Have you changed your style as you have aged? How and why? Are there "never wear" rules for you regarding clothing choices? What is your philosophy regarding investment dressing? Let's support each other in feeling confident wearing what we want when we want. Your experiences and insights are valuable to our community.

---

Thank you for visiting Leaving Middle Age! If you like what you read, please share this newsletter with your friends, family, and acquaintances. And if YOU still need to subscribe, please do so. It is free and a step towards building a community that cares.